It's officially official.
I have just signed myself up for my first marathon.
I was going to do the sensible thing. Start training and see how I felt as the mileage increased. If all went well up to about 25k, I figured I'd sign up then.
Instead, in a moment of mild panic, I pulled out my credit card, entered my birth date and chose my shirt size. Because as I sat at my desk, a little voice in my head whispered - what if it sells out?
The website shows the maximum runners allowed for the marathon as 1500. But there is no indication as to whether there are 100 people already registered or 1000. Imagine finding out too late that it has sold out. That would, in simple terms, totally suck.
So I signed up.
I remember the first time I chose 'half marathon' from an online drop down menu. I felt slightly hysterical - like I was just a little bit nuts even thinking I could run that far. That hysteria lasted throughout the training and I constantly wondered if I was completely crazy for even trying it. This time, as I chose 'marathon', I felt rather peaceful. Like I know I will somehow pull this off but there is no point wasting one ounce of energy worrying about how. I'll be needing that energy to train.
Unless a catastrophe happens (which it could I suppose), I will be standing at that start line on October 23rd. I was also be crossing the finish line (hopefully the calendar will still say October 23rd!). The 42.2 kilometers between the two points will remain shrouded in mystery until the day of but I'm guessing I will feel exhilirated, defeated, exhausted, pumped, strong, determined, unable to carry on and unwilling to give up. I will cry several times for several different reasons. I will spot friends on the course and their support will keep me moving. I will spot the finish line and honestly doubt whether I will make it. I fully expect to feel all of these things, plus some nausea thrown in for fun.
Maybe that's why I'm not scared.
I have faced these demons before and, if I've learned nothing else, I have learned that I can kick their ass when I need to.
I'm sure that I will face things I haven't encountered before. But I'm confident enough in my ability to push through that I'm not staying up nights worrying about it.
Come what may...
So I've signed up and told the world.
Let's get this show on the road!