Thursday, October 18, 2012

Drag Queen

So far, I have been tied to a parachute.

Tied to buckets.

Tied to the wall.

All in an effort to build strength in the pool.

Guess what the latest plan is to create resistance and increase drag?

No ropes. Nothing dragging behind us. Nothing tethering us to the pool. Just some good ol'fashioned clothes.

Apparently, swimming with clothes on is really hard. It creates lots of drag. Lots and lots of drag. Also, apparently, if you jump into the pool fully clothed and try to swim, you can cause all sorts of injuries.

So we're building up to it.

Friday, we have to show up with a tight fitting, long-sleeved shirt. We are going to wear it during our workout.

Monday, we are supposed to bring socks and an old pair of running shoes. We are going to be swimming with shoes on. (Did I mention I was running a half marathon on Sunday??)

Then we will work up to pants, then pants and a shirt, then pants and a shirt and shoes. The ultimate goal is to swim 200m fully clothed. I'll let you know what day that is so you can show up for lane swimming and just laugh at the whole lot of us floundering around. I may bring my toque for extra fun...

I'm predicting after all the drag we'll be training with, when we try to swim in only our bathing suits, we will swim across the pool so fast we could actually damage the wall on the other side. Perhaps we should wear helmets...?

And I figure it's great training for when I'm on a cruise ship and it sinks in the middle of the ocean. I will jump into the water in my ball gown, tiara and high heels and tread water easily for three days until the rescue ship arrives, holding up eight other people the entire time and catching fish with my teeth.


  1. Holy crap, I can't even imagine! You are going to be SO STRONG after all of this!!

    Your last paragraph cracked me up! Catching fish with your teeth!? Ha!

  2. Ha ha aha! I'm going to get you a ten-gallon hat to wear in the pool. And do let us know when you swim across in your "normal people" clothes. I want to be there and laugh.

    That reminds me of the conversation we had at the lake a couple years ago. One person said, "When I saw so-and-so at the grocery store, it took me a moment to figure out who she was. Things got awkward when I said, 'I didn't recognize you with your clothes on....'"